Well, this has been a long time coming.
I've joined and am posting using an old account - the new one is Pwnie, should you ever feel the need to add or contact me. The reason I desire anonymity is because my boyfriend believes he is bisexual. I'm pretty sure if he ever sees this it will probably mean the end of our relationship.
Regardless, this is a topic that he refuses to discuss and I need an outlet for it or I'm bound to go mad. I am female and have been in a relationship with this boy - we are both seventeen - for six years now.
First, I'm curious as to why there are so many posts here and elsewhere about the bisexual and bi-curious fads among females, while little or no attention is paid to that of males? I don't believe bisexuality is a legitimate orientation and, even if I'm incorrect, I don't believe my partner is right about his orientation.
He exhibits most of the characteristics typical of our generation - piercings, anarchist, drug use, drinking, alternative music and clothing, elitist attitude, love of Japculture [manga, anime], use of the [best] internet and technology, atheist, 'mental illness' and so on.
He is a real pessimist, seems to be somewhat of a sheep - even though, ironically, he tries his hardest to be different - and I think he imagines a lot of his own ailments, sexuality included.
When we met, I was dating an older fellow, who I left for my current boyfriend. Although Guy A was heterosexual, he and my new beau hit it off famously. For fear that I would be left by both of them, I suggested we try some sort of polyamory. It worked, for a while, but the jealousy was too much and I cracked under the pressure. After an awful month or so I made Guy B choose between us.
A lot of people have had crushes on my BF, including his male friends. I have even been threatened with death for 'opressing' my BF. He has dated one other female, while we were on a break. He looks at gay pornography and he has 'accidentally' kissed a male schoolmate of his while we were together.
He refuses to 'come out' to his parents but makes a point of telling everyone he knows - friends, siblings - that he is, in fact, not heterosexual. I can't help but believe that this is just a sad and unfortunate case of his wanting to fit in. I love him in most other aspects (with the exception of his pessimism, substance use and lack of education).
I fear I will never be able to marry or sustain a long term relationship with him if he can't make up his mind, though, and it's approaching the point where we move in together or move on.
Any tips? Please help.